Grateful for UT?!

I've just spent a lot of the day reflecting and whether anyone sees this or not, because it's probably been 6 months since I wrote last, no one even knows this blog still exists! Part of the reflection comes from a large up coming event. Tomorrow is the 8 year anniversary of when I became a mommy. Which also happens to be a big birthday for Tyler. My darling little Tyler is getting baptized Saturday. I'm so excited for him! I don't know if it's all the growing up going on around me but I just feel a little like life is just beating me today. Like I'm trying to run with it, but I just can't run fast enough. Those of you who know my competitive side, this is not a recipe for inner peace. I walked out my front door today to get Jake from school and felt the sun mixed with extreme cold and wind and something about the air made me miss Washington so bad it hurt. Which lead to a what am I doing here? Which lead to where have the years gone? And suddenly I'm in this melancholy state, which doesn't bode well since my amazing in-laws are due to arrive in 2 hours and I haven't showered yet. (It's 12:01 pm) And then by the time I got home from getting Jake I had moved to grateful, which I thought was a quick and nice turnaround. I don't usually admit this, but there are some things about UT I'm grateful for. Listen up, this is the only time this list will appear in public. ;)
1. I do love the mountains, they are majestic and at any given moment can turn you gaze upward, which automatically changes your life.
2. I love the lack of mold. As beautiful as the rain forest look in Washington is, I do not miss the 40 days of straight rain which then make your yard smell like last years fridge science project.
3. Family. Although we are all from Washington, somehow we are all here. Why is that? Until we can answer that, there's no where I'd rather be than near the people who have to love me no matter what!
4. Glenn and Kecia. they live here, so for that reason, we need to live here! Life just wouldn't be as much fun and filled with as much love if we didn't live by our best friends and their darling little Emma
5. I love my gym. I'm sure I would have a gym in B'ham I loved, but I LOVE this gym. They have amazing instructors that have changed my life, literally.
6. Along with the gym, I'm grateful for a new found love of Eastern arts. I've spent at least 40 hours in the last year practicing yoga and although Brian teases me that he never thought I'd be able to be still long enough to even remember how to breath much less meditate, this has brought a peace to my life that I never realized could exist. This is because of my amazing yoga instructor Abbey, whom I absolutely adore. She makes it real and personal even in a class full of 30 people. Washington doesn't have Abbey, so she goes on the UT list.
7. The running trails. They don't have many hills here, not like home anyways, so running seems a little more lazy, although the altitude just kills....still....
8. Jake and Tyler's friends. I love the kids they hang with. I've heard more moving, sweet, funny things come out of the mouths of these children I've grown to love and respect than I've heard from most adults.
9. The opportunity UT provides to make me really reflect on who I am and who I want to be. I find a lot of cookie cutter people here...uh a lot....and it just makes me have a profound gratitude for my ability to be myself. I don't know what I'd do if I couldn't just be comfy in my own skin, I would hate to have to dance to someone Else's tune, I'm glad to live in a place that reminds me that being yourself is one of the most important things you can learn.
10. I love the sunshine. Even the word looks beautiful, let me say that word again..SUNSHINE!!!! You can't write that word in Seattle. (well you can, but it just looks funny)

So there you go, silly sappiness from me. I guess a day of reflection is what it take to get me back to the blog. Maybe I'll go all out and change my blog decor from Autumn to spring!

Edited at 1:17 to add:
I must be having a grateful day! I keep thinking of things I love!
11. Eggs in the city. Although finding places to eat that fit our strict requirments are hard here, this place fits the bill !!! There is nothing like a basic burrito with side of ranch..oh man, I'm hungry!
12. My chili's chillins...I've made some friendships that will last a lifetime! Ry, Stogs, this one's for you :)
13. Coffee connection. This is the only place that has it right. An avid hot cocoa drinker, this place suits me to a "T"! Comfy couches, good tables, unique service....yes I do drive 36 minutes for a hot chocolate.
14. The radio stations. I love that there is more variety than hip hop and Neil diamond.

I might have to just keep this list going.... it's probably good for me :)

Did I really just do that?

This week has been one of milestones. Brian called from the highway the other night and asked if I was busy. Uh, am I ever at 9:30pm? He then asked me to come outside for a moment. In true Hallmark style, as I'm freezing my tush off in the midst of an early cold front on my porch, my hub pulls around the corner in a car. Not just any car, my car. Well, hopefully soon to be my car...A 2000 white Ford Mustang GT. In amazing condition, just humming along.

Now for those of you who have been blessed to never be present when I get going on Mustangs, let me explain to you why this was one of those moments. The 2000 is one of two Mustangs ever built to posses the "tail end" body style that seriously makes my heart stop. I am in no position to purchase a 2008 in cash, so that leaves option number two, the 2000.

Yeah, I know, I'm an idiot, but I'm ok with it, and I assume you all are too, or we wouldn't still be friends right? :)

Well, upon driving this baby around for a couple hours, I started getting this little wild hair. Thoughts started running thru my head. Things like; "maybe it's time to REALLY clean the garage" "Maybe we should finally let go of all that baby stuff" Next thing you know, I've listed my crib, changing table, jogging stroller, toddler bed and baby clothes on KSL. Not that I've written off additional rug rats...only that just maybe, this could be a fun, care free new time for our little family. We have no immediate plans to enlarge our family, so why not? Why not have room to actually park a CAR in our garage?! (I know, what a thought right?) Why not drive a car that would be absolutly impossible with kids younger than mine. Why not wear my nice shirts around the house, no ones spitting up on them anymore... So I think I'm selling the Explorer too. Saying goodbye for a bit to the era I love, of babies and toddlers and bottles and blankies. And welcoming with open arms, and a few tissues an era I'm learning to love more, with soccer games, rock climbing, mustangs, Harry Potter, and kids who make their own chocolate milk.

A little reflection

So this morning I had the pleasure of reading a letter sent to the Washington Post in response to a childless woman wondering if motherhood is all about relaxing. It lead me to reflection, which, as you know, often makes me sappy. Sorry. Those of you who visit here regularly and find my sappy side a little exhausting, feel free to skip this post. :)

This morning I curled my hair in this new way that I love. And hate. Because it takes a good 15 minutes just for the curling iron, which is in addition to the 12 1/2 minutes it takes to dry this curly mop in some semblance of straight and normal. This makes for a large chunk of my morning. And as I'm looking at my hair and loving the way it looks, I'm thinking to myself..."can this possibly be worth it? What a selfish expenditure of 15 minutes! It will be ruined the minute I walk out in this mushy snow fall, etc, etc..." I reflected on the amount of times in a day I do something just because I want to. Today is not a good example, I had cocoa puffs for breakfast instead of the usual protein shake and toast, because I wanted to. I curled my hair, I'm writing on my blog....you get the idea. And I realized how fabulous this thing called mommyhood is.

I wake each morning because someone wants cinnamon toast, or someone can't find glasses, or "oh no!! I had homework last night and I 'forgot'!" My feet hit the ground a shade under running and still grumbly and unfocused I've got toast going, a pencil dug out of the drawer for homework, glasses in the other hand, one child on my leg for a hug and a husband leaning in for a kiss. The phone is ringing and in addition to all this, I'm thinking to myself; "don't forget to add shortening to the grocery list, I'm watching the neighbor's kid today, got to change the blog wallpaper, did I answer my brother's last email?, my mom is sick so I should do something for her?, where am I going to park for the Jazz game I'm taking Tyler to tonight? Are the Jazz shirts clean?......."

This, mind you, is all before 7:46. Something about this does not say relaxing. Which leads me to what is does say, to me anyways.

It says I've become much better at multi-tasking. I still remember the first night home with Tyler. The first midnight scream fest, trying to figure out what's wrong and barely being able to change a diaper because I couldn't focus from the loud crying emitting from this child that is now all mine.
It says I have people that think I have all the answers, or at least the important ones, like pencils and glasses and toast.
It says that it matters if I disappeared all of a sudden. Brian certainly isn't going to change the wallpaper on the blog, nor would he know what to do with shortening, much less that it should go on the grocery list.
It says I have a full life, where people love and need me. Where I am depended upon to bring miniature versions of adults thru life safely, teaching them things that they will learn no where else. This morning Jake learned it's not the smartest idea to wipe your face when you have soap on your hands by his own experience, but I was the one who taught him how to fix the arm on the transformer, perhaps making him as good a fix-it guy as his mom is fix-it girl.

So, although I will freely admit, during quiet time each day, I get a good 30 minutes of un-interrupted "me" time. I've not found this mommy thing to be about relaxing, but honestly, I wouldn't have it any other way. I do (a lot of) important stuff everyday, and someday, when my little dudes are all grown up, hopefully who they become will be a reflection and reward for how little I relaxed everyday.